Dating strippers for self-improvement

I got the following link from Avalon's blog. It links to a site advertising an ebook titled "How To Date a Stunning Stripper". In a bold black font with screaming yellow highlighting, the web site states:

Success with a stripper will change the way others view you, and more importantly, it will forever change the way you view yourself.

Seriously, no. If people think you're a dork and you start dating a stunning stripper, they'll think you're a dork dating a stunning stripper.

More importantly, it won't change the way you view yourself. You may get a temporary boost from dating a stripper, but your insecurities will still be there, and eventually you're going to realize that dating a stripper didn't change anything and you're still the same person you were before with the same problems. If you really must go through with this, buy a sports car and go through the process with an inanimate object, rather than making some girl's life miserable by using her in your unsuccessful attempt to compensate for your perceived inadequacies.

If you need to validate yourself by dating strippers, you're not secure enough to date strippers. You're not going to be able to deal with the fact that your stripper girlfriend earns her living by dancing naked in other men's laps while the men get aroused. And if you can't deal with that, how are you going to deal with the fact that she's human and occasionally she's going to find some of her customers attractive and enjoy dancing naked in their laps while they get aroused?

Next up on the web site is

My Most Memorable Moment

I took my first dancer girlfriend to a work-related Christmas party. It was amazing. We walked in and everyone noticed. She was terrific, a perfect dress that showed off her awesome body and long legs without being trashy. Gorgeous hair and makeup - stunning. And if there is one thing a stripper knows how to do, it's work a room. She does it every night. We talked to everyone including the company president, she turned on the charm and they all fell in love. But she made it clear that she was with me. I was king for the night. It's something that every man should experience. It's something that you should experience. I'll remember it as long as I live.

**January Update!**

This New Year's Eve almost beat that first Christmas party. I'm still recovering from the limo ride home!

His life is so lacking in personal accomplishments that his most memorable moment involved reflected glory? He'll spend the rest of his life remembering being with someone who knew how to work a room?

Note that he's not just promising us strippers; he's promising us strippers who have phenomenal looks, phenomenal social skills, and enough education to mix with top corporate officers. And that last sentence seems to be promising phenomenal sex skills.

It's been a long time since I was in a strip club; I remember girls who were attractive but not much out of the ordinary. Dating strippers is more likely to get you a chubby girlfriend with short legs than a girl who looks like a supermodel. I shared a house with a friend and his stripper girlfriend once. She and her friends were reasonably intelligent but not the sort of people who would shine in a room full of corporate executives. Their conversation tended to be about how shitfaced they got the night before, who was running around on her boyfriend, and "Oh my god, let me tell you what this customer did last night!" And while I don't want to perpetuate a stereotype, I have to admit that a certain amount of time was spent discussing where to get the good cocaine. I'm trying to imagine this sort of conversation at a company Christmas party, and I think the ad might be right. That might be a memorable moment that I'd remember for the rest of my life.

The crux of the ad is the fact that strippers almost always say that they don't date customers, but many strippers date guys they met on the job. Most strippers are female, and for reasons I'll never understand, females are attracted to us guys. Since they're strippers, most of the guys they meet are customers. Finding a boyfriend is a somewhat random process, and is most likely to happen in places where girls meet the most guys. So some strippers date guys that were once customers. Since they've got a boyfriend, they're not currently dating customers. And many of the remainder of the strippers are dating someone they met off the job. So, most strippers don't date customers.

Contrary to what the web site says, strippers don't say "I don't date customers" because they're confused, or because they don't know who they want to date, or they're not aware of their subconscious urges. "I don't date customers" is a polite way of saying "You belong to the category of guys I don't date." For the strippers who have boyfriends, you're in that category because you're not their boyfriend. For the remainder, you're in that category because they're tired of fending off date requests and it's easier to say that they don't date customers than to isolate the precise factors that cause them not to date you.

In addition, the ratio of strippers to customers in a strip club works against the customers. And strippers meet many customers who are physically attractive, nice guys, and generally good boyfriend material, so even if you're the guy that every girl is dreaming of, you're not going to stand out.

Of course, you can't have a book on how to date strippers that says that the process is random and the odds are against you. Since this book is written for guys with low self-esteem, which means guys who assume that women don't want to date them, there has to be some way of tricking the stripper into dating. This has all been done before in various how-to-get-dates books, and the author wants to assure us that his book is different. No hypnosis, no neurolinguistic programming, no pretending to be a photographer or a producer. Those involve too much work anyway, and the author has discovered something that requires no effort on your part.

This program is based on an understanding of a powerful subconscious need that most strippers have and are not even aware of.

That's right, a woman's intelligence is just weak disguise for her unacknowledged subconscious needs. Who needs hypnosis when women can be controlled through their own desires?

After looking over the web site, I've decided that this book was written by a stripper. First of all, the book stays

At its core, a strip club is just a well-designed, legal, fantasy designed to separate you from your money as quickly as possible.

At its core, a book on dating strippers is just a well-designed, legal fantasy designed to separate you from your money as quickly as possible. Clearly, the author understands how to sell a sexual fantasy that has little hope of fulfillment.

But more importantly, the author says

I’m sure I don’t have to remind you to follow the rules regarding touching. If in doubt, ask.

And

Get Her to ask You Out!

And

Give her time, space, fun and consistency.

Think about this. If you're a stripper, isn't the ideal customer someone who follows the rules on touching, doesn't pester you for dates, and consistently gives you time, space, and fun? I think the strippers are using guys' subconscious desires to trick them into behaving better. I think they're letting us think that we're using them when they're really using us. And since the target market is guys, and since we all know what happens to guys' intelligence whenever they're dealing with naked boobs, there's a real chance that the strippers will succeed.

So buy the book if you want, boys, but keep those dollar bills coming!